M4, Machete, Grenades, Tanks, Switch Blades... all of these can rip you to shreds in a short period. I would suggest that they can't come close to the amount of damage that can be done with the tongue. There's the old saying... Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. This is what we're taught as kids to be able to cope with some of the harsh things other children say. I have to say, children can come of with some of the harshest things when they want to. No doubt I remember some things that were said to me that I remember to this day as well as things I said as a child that I later found out hurt someone well into their adult hood. Talk about regret! At the same time, you can heal with that same tongue... AMAZING! That God would give us a tool that powerful and yet we take it for granted every day!

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James 3 3If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. 4Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. 5So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! 6And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. 7For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, 8but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. 10From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. 11Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? 12Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.

Brothers and Sisters, James certainly doesn't make light of the power of the tongue. How evil it can be... how devistating! What does he compare it to? 3 things that are extremely small yet control large things or create something so much bigger. "The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell". Wow! All this, and most of us run around saying what we will, bad mouthing people around us... even if it's just in jest. God created the world with his spoken word and created us in His image! Is it really okay to just wonder around saying what we will... as long as it's all in good fun? My friends, with your tongue you can determine the path of your life... the path of your eternity! The tongue is what we use to confess your salvation and worship Christ and we would run around lying in business, lashing out at our spouses, gossiping about those around us, making fun of those less fortunate than us?!

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Jesus spoke of our mouths in Matthew 15: 8 "'This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me; 9in vain do they worship me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.'" 17Do you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is expelled? 18But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. 19For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. 20 These are what defile a person.

From out of the heart the mouth speaks! Pastor Jimmy once put it this way... don't run around saying hurtful things to your spouse or whoever you're talking to and then later say, awe I didn't mean it, it was just a joke. Don't tell me you didn't mean it... you DID mean it! My friends, our mouths are meant to worship the Father and to give others the opportuntiy to do the same. They are more powerful than we can imagine! Think about a time in your life when someone said something to you and even if it was a joke, you at least wondered... are they serious... am I really dumb? Do I really look fat? Am I really no good... worth nothing? Not to mention how you felt when someone says something to lash out and is intentionally trying to hurt you. No doubt you put on a tough face and cover it up but we all know how it feels inside. We have to understand that we can utterly destroy people with our mouths!

On the flip side of that, think about a time that you were feeling beat down... had an absolutely horrible day and someone walked up to you, put an arm around you and said, I love you and am here for you. You are an amazing child of God and I thank God for you on a daily basis. God has a plan for you and I am going to see you through! How did that make you feel? With just a few simple words, we can be utterly lifted up and back in the saddle, ready to proceed in the fight for the Gospel!

Friends, we can save a life or destroy it with our mouths. We can let the Lord use our tongue to save a soul or we can drive a soul to hell by setting fires with it while unbelievers are around, causing them to want nothing to do with Christ. It's our choice. Granted it's not easy and there is no way we can do it ourselves. We have got to turn our tongue over to the Holy Spirit. How do we do that? We meditate on His Word, get in it daily and stay in prayer! Keep our hearts right and pure before Christ and then we won't have to worry about what comes out of it because as Jesus said, out of the heart the mouth speaks and if we keep God's word in our heart then that is what will come out... not filth!

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Psalm 119:9-16 9 How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word. 10 With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments! 11 I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. 12 Blessed are you, O LORD; teach me your statutes! 13 With my lips I declare all the rules of your mouth. 14 In the way of your testimonies I delight as much as in all riches. 15 I will meditate on your precepts and fix my eyes on your ways. 16 I will delight in your statutes; I will not forget your word.

I leave you with this story about how a young man's kind words and actions altered the course of another one. If you've read it before, go ahead and read it anyway... it's a great example. Blessings to you all!

One day, when I was a freshman in high school,
I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.
His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.
I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?
He must really be a nerd."
I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I s aw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.
His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.
He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes
My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.
As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks."
They really should get lives.
“He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!"
There was a big smile on his face.
It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.
I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before.
He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.
He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football
with my friends
He said yes.
We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!
"He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends..
When we were seniors we began to think about college.
Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.
He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship.
Kyle was valedictorian of our class.
I teased him all the time about being a nerd.
He had to prepare a speech for graduation.
I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak
Graduation day, I saw Kyle.
He looked great.
He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school.
He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.
He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.
Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.
I could see that he was nervous about his speech.
So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be great!"
He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.
“Thanks," he said.
As h e started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began
"Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.
Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...
I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.
I am going to tell you a story."
I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.
He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.
He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.
"Thankfully, I was saved.
My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."
I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.
Not until that moment did I realize its depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions.
With one small gesture you can change a person's life.

Henry I hesitate to say anything at all because what you said is so good. BAM. This kind of post takes a lot of time to prepare and deserves more exposure than it gets in this format. I do not have an answer but controlling our tongue is something that should be in front of us all the time not, just here for a couple of days and then forgotten.

Agreed!! I saw a demonstration once. Our Pastor gave us 10 cans of shaving cream and let us spray it out into this huge bowl. We made a master mess but it was really fun. When it was all done he said, now let's put it back in the cans.

Everyone just sat there staring at him. I remember him telling us that such is the nature of our words. It can be adventurous and fun and feel "bold" to just let go and drop our words like bombs but it cannot be undone. We can never un-say something. Once it's out- it's out.

Thank you Scott. It was crazy, I was reading in Matthew where Jesus was talking on the mouth and I felt God tell me to do a study on it. So I went to James because I knew he talked about it and while I was reading James, I began to see other things I wanted to do a study on. God then told me to stay focused and do the study He had shown me. It was clear that He wants us to focus on the things that are or are not coming out of our mouths.

Heavenbound, great example and great point! Once they come out, they are out and there is no putting them back! Thanks so much for that!

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James 3:3-6 Behold, we put bits in the horses' mouths, that they may obey us; and we turn about their whole body. Behold also the ships, which though they be so great, and are driven of fierce winds, yet are they turned about with a very small helm, whithersoever the governor listeth. Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth! And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.

Digging back into Mo's origional reference point of study. When we really stop and think about it; anyone on this website or that I talk to throughout the day has the power to say something that could devastate me right now. And in another line of thought every one of them…of you have the ability to type or say something that would literally make my day!

We so often forget how much control we have over someone else with our words. It’s truly crazy when you think about it; even a complete stranger has the ability to tear us down or lift us up!

I am guilty of saying things jokingly…that very nearly destroy another. And many of us do this. We try to joke around, or get used to talking that way and all of a sudden that person has been crippled by what we said. I kind of grew up in that environment. Things were usually said jokingly to each other…little Jabs…and when I hit a certain age it’s like it all sank in and I started believing I was useless…worthless. What is even more crazy is these things continue to haunt me today! They constantly rise up and I have to battle them back down.

How about when a rumor starts. Has a rumor ever risen about you; something you knew for a fact that wasn’t true? Now think about this, one way or another did that rumor haunt you? Did you walk around thinking about it…telling yourself “what a horrible lie, why would they say that?” …well….it effected you!

Think about how a small little spark can create a fire that destroys 1,000s of acres of land and everything on it! In the same a small misspoke word can devastate, destroy and completely CRUSH another person. This ministry was almost completely destroyed a few years ago by this very thing. A slight mis-understanding that led to anger. This anger caused both sides to walk away feeling injured, and neither have returned since. In addition to this it drove many others away as this unfolded. This fued caused me to pack up shop for a while and truly re-evaluate the entire thing. All of this because of ONE misspoken word.

Pay close attention to what the Bible says about our words; the tongue. It says it is “Set on fire…by Hell!” Is that not horrifying? The very words I use today, what I type…could be set on FIRE by HELL! Understand Paul is saying that Satan himself could influence what I have to say. The words I say or type could be coming straight from Hell itself; this makes me feel sick inside! We have to always be thinking about this. We must always be reminding ourselves when we use our tongue to tear someone down or gossip stop and think who…what…is controlling it…Hell!

The Bible has so much to say about this issue. I have to be careful because I am one of those who can easily "speak before I think." James devotes an entire chapter to this. Paul tells us not to let any unwholesome words come out of our mouth, but only such as for edification! Now that's a challenge.

Proverbs is full of admonitions about our words. Pro 26:17 He who passes by enraging himself over strife not his own is like one who takes a dog by the ears,
Pro 26:18 or like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death.
Pro 26:19 so is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, Am I not joking?
Pro 26:20 Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; and where there is no talebearer, the fighting ceases.
Pro 26:21 As coals to burning coals, and wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome man to kindle fighting.
Pro 26:22 The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.
Pro 26:23 Burning lips and a wicked heart are like a broken piece of pottery with silver waste.
Pro 26:24 He who hates pretends with his lips and stores up deceit within him.
Pro 26:25 When he makes his voice gracious, do not believe him; for seven hateful things are in his heart.
Pro 26:26 He whose hatred is covered by deceit, his wickedness shall be shown before the congregation.
Pro 26:27 Whoever digs a pit shall fall into it; and he who rolls a stone, it will turn back to him.
Pro 26:28 A lying tongue hates those afflicted by it, and a flattering mouth works ruin.

How often are we guilty of minimizing those Scriptures. We say destructive things and then justify it. I have even heard people justify their cruel tongue by saying that "even Jesus had fun!"

When I was a kid, my dad and my brother teased me mercilessly. I can tell you that it still affects me to this day. I think this is where the "rubber meets the road" so to speak in our Christian walk. How many times are we guilty of building ourselves up by tearing someone else down? And....would that actually fit under the category of God resists the proud??????

That is exactly what I'm talking about Sue. People sometimes "tease" thinking they are being funny...even showing effection...but in reality as you said they are only tearing another down! Man...I gotta be honest, I give my girls a hard time...fairly often...I am going to have to be a little more on gaurd for this!

Check this one out! It's another pretty powerful example of what I mean by your tongue is "controled" by the enemy is here; Peter makes what seems an innocent statement, out of Love for Jesus. Jesus responds with understanding of where these words came from.

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Matthew 16:21-23 From that time forth began Jesus to shew unto his disciples, how that he must go unto Jerusalem, and suffer many things of the elders and chief priests and scribes, and be killed, and be raised again the third day. Then Peter took him, and began to rebuke him, saying, Be it far from thee, Lord: this shall not be unto thee. But he turned, and said unto Peter, Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men.

This statement when looked at closer is not out of love, but rebellion against God, and straight from Satan attempting to sway Jesus from the task that the Father-Head of God set Him on. Now think about this closely. Has God ever told you to do something, and others told you it would never work? This very website is one of these things, the PODcast is another! Henry and I were two of four guys who used to meet regularly and study together. We would all often sit with one another, write studies and share them! It truly was a great time, and I miss the other two very much! But when we started re-building this ministry they said some pretty hurtful things. And due to them a few times I wanted to throw in the towel. These are great men of God! Our brothers in the Kingdom! Yet it was much the same as the conversation between Jesus and Peter. They said things; trying to give us what they thought was good advice…yet, it was words being sent straight from Hell! Mo’ and I knew what God had tasked us with, re-building this site was something that took us a while to even begin; maybe close to two months before we even started. The PODcast took us a year to record the first show! They, just as Peter were only giving their opinion on what was going on; how many of us have done that? Just as Peter how many times was our opinion on worldly desires and ideals rather than whose of God?

There have been many times I truly do not think through what I am about to say in a conversation. I am quick to give my opinion on something. Rather than praying on it, or seeking God before I answer..I just vomit out my own thoughts…

A thought that has really been hanging over me lately is do we truly understand that every time we give our opinion on a matter, we are “teaching,” we are influencing another persons perspective on a area….teaching them; influencing their mindset. In this we had better be sure we are giving Biblical advice…and not blurting out our own, going off of our emotions…allowing Hell to use us!

I had another thought on this throughout the week, so I thought I would throw it on the board! It is amazing how we can “tame” every animal on the earth to one degree or another, and yet this little piece of flesh in our mouths is un-tamable! Did you know the average weight of the adult male tongue is 70 grams, for a female, 60 grams. It is hard to believe this thing has so much power not only over us, but everyone around us.

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James 3:7-9 For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind: But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God.

We can not separate our relationship with God from our relationship with people. For example we can not claim to love God, and hate another Christian…why? Because that other person is a temple of the Holy Spirit. To do this is to hate part of God! I have known many who I did not really care for…at all! Not even thinking about the fact that this is a part of Gods people…this is another child of God, whom He loves just as much as me. It does not matter what they have done to me, how they have hurt me…they may be like an injured animal that is lashing out at everyone around them…and in need of help! Am I truly part of the body if I am the hand and this person the ear, but I don’t like the ear…so I am going to cut it off! Is that truly how a body works in unison?

Another thought is this; think of the words you use around your church pastor. Do you speak differently around them then you do everyone else? You know in your head as you speak with him that you are in effect speaking to the temple of God right? Why are you not approaching everyone this way? Every single person who has taken up their cross and became a Christian is in effect a temple of God, are we not all indwelt by the Holy Spirit?
Why is it we so often feel a freedom to say things about people who are NOT Christians; because these people are not temples of the Holy Spirit? Pay very close attention to this scripture, it does not say the believer, followers of Christ…it just says “men, which are made after the similitude of God.” This destroys the mindset for me! It does not limit our approach to the indwelt of the Holy Spirit, but to every man, woman and child! We all after all meet the one qualification here do we not? We have all been made in the likeness of God the Father. So in truth do we have a right to curse anyone, to gossip about anyone? The answer for those of us who are slow is no. We have no right to curse anyone God created.

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James 3:10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.

The Bible makes very clear, we cannot use our mouths to both praise God and curse fellow man. When we became Christian we were taken in by God…bought by God, and in turn must give ourselves over to His will, and not our own. Because our own desires are of the world. We must allow Him to rebuild us into new creatures and stop reaching back into the world.

As Chan preached on the topic he used an illustration that…well…was gross. Imagine you go visit family and forgot your toothbrush. Your (lets say Aunt) tells you not to worry she has plenty, she quickly goes and brings you one; she hands it over to you and says “There you go, its yours.” That toothbrush belongs to you now right…why would she want it back right! However, the next day she sneaks into your room and takes it because your cousin lost their toothbrush; she continues to do this daily…taking the toothbrush back and forth without you knowing for a few days. One day you wake up and go to the bathroom, get ready to brush your teeth and the toothbrush is gone. Your Aunt knocks on your door and hands it back to you, she says “Oh I’m sorry, this was Jacobs last toothbrush, and I was having to let you guys share it.” She smiles and walks away. Now, if you are like me…you would do everything in you to keep what you had for dinner the night before in your stomach! The mere thought is repulsive to me…

Understand, when we became a believer we said “God, here is my tongue. Here are my eyes, my hands…etc. They are yours, I am yours!” Imagine the next day as you wake up, grab your tongue, and sneak back into the world. You take it straight to Satan and say “Here you go…I know you might need this for a little bit today.” When he is done you take it back to God and tell Him “Oh, I’m sorry God, I just needed to let him use it for a little bit…he didn’t have any other…he needed it to gossip.” WHAT! Do you think God might be just as revolted as you would be about the toothbrush thing! I picture God sitting his throne saying “I don’t want that filthy thing back after Satan used it!” That my friends is the mindset that we must get into. We belong to God, or the world…but cannot belong to both.

Scott and Myles, I'm with you guys. It's funny because the more you put yourself out there, the more people begin to come to you for advice, whether they are Christians or of the world. I find it to be true that I want to have an answer every time for whatever they come to me with so that I will be taken seriously. Either that or I will have an opinion for something without even being asked about it. I'm sure none of you understand what that's like at all. ;-)

Here is what we have got to remember. If we wait on the Lord, he will be faithful to guide us in the use of our tongues he will be the one to provide the answer and he is NEVER wrong. However when we are quick to respond, there are times more often than not that we throw words out there that are our own and not of God, necessarily. I really believe that most of the time it's even done with the right intentions. We don't want to look foolish as a child of God so we'd better have the answer so he doesn't look stupid. As if we have to take up for God because he's not big enough. Yeah... that's pretty funny!

And then there are the times of the case that Myles was talking about where our two brothers were coming at us pretty hard. I can promise you they had great intentions but it was pretty rough and definitely didn't feel that the advice was of God. Had they taken time to pray over it for their brothers... us... I would bet the response would have been different. This is a good example of us needing to watch the things we say in ALL cases. Children, Family, Christian Family, children of the world, and so on.

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James 1:19 19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;20 for the anger of man does not produce the r

ighteousness of God.

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James 3:11-12 Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.

Something that is important to remember when thinking on this is understanding that we cannot change our tongue…it is un-tamable. We cannot make it into something that it is not, we can’t turn it into something new. What we must do however is go to the CORE of who we are; all of us need to go to the heart of ourselves. We are made anew as we become Christians, not from the outside in…but from the inside out. This is the only way we can “fix” this issue of the tongue. God will re-build us as the Holy Spirit indwells us…but we can’t fight Him on it. We have to give ourselves over to Him and submit to His will first.

Why do blessings and cursings come from the same tongue, because our heart is at war with the Holy Spirit! This topic has not been about “Biting your tongue” or “Holding back your words.” I think at its core it has been about learning to say “I will watch what I feel about that person. I will learn to see them through God’s eyes and not my own.” Its not about offering “Lip Service” to make people feel better about themselves; its about loving your friends and your enemies alike as much as you love yourself. Its about begging God to change our very hearts…the core of who we are!